Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
all i tweeted was "emergency this is not a drill" and he immediately texted me asking if this was a subtle booty call…it was
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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