I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
Randomize
