I'm drive I can fine osifer
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
And then my night got REAL pukey
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
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