Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
I woke up this morning really drunk with my Christmas lights on and two owls in my bed.
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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