She's JV to your varsity
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
Randomize
