it wasn't lemon gatorade
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
