I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
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