I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
