Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
I need to sanitize my soul.
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
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