Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize
