Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
we should paint friendship bongs
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