my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
Randomize
