My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
I microwaved pizza rolls, a hot dog, and bacon in the same plate with no paper towels. I drank the grease at the end. I'm going to vomit everywhere.
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
