"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize
