Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
This is the best 30th birthday ever. In a Motel 6 drinking a shower beer and sending slow-mo dick helicopter videos to you.
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
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