escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
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