i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
Randomize
