Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
Why am I always the sober one?
Cause you're the only one with any sort of self control. It's kinda your super power...
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
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