So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
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