If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
Today's psa: there are certain parts of your body you shouldn't scratch while wearing fake nails.
you just tore your cootch a new one, didn't you?
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
Never let your siblings swipe right.
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Randomize
