I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
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