she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
