Have you finally orgasmed yet?
you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
Randomize
