Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
You can't special order awesome
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
Randomize
