nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
Randomize
