Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
Randomize
