No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
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