Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
It's 1:26 and I have already found 5 fruit flies between 3 separate glasses of wine. This is supposed to be a summer problem. Fucking global warming.
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
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