Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
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