i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
Please tell me how you drunkenly remembered your social security number when we were checking you into the ER.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
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