I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
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