you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
Just puked most of my soul out..
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
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