i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
Randomize
