I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
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