NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children