Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
Randomize
