Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
I just got into the cab. It smells like weed and the driver looks like someone who may or may not be really talented at playing the saxophone. He also asked me my thoughts on porn when I told him I'm an actor. I might not make it home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
How to not get laid: tell him he reminds you of your brother. While having sex. Thanks, vodka.
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
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