i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
Randomize
