If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
Heyyyy darlin are you busy?
Why hello drunk Jake. It's sober Sarah, I'll tell drunk Sarah you booty called. She'll probably be around tomorrow night.
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
Randomize
