I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
Randomize
