you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
Also: I hate her so much. She's out at hooters, making spelling errors, while I'm literally sitting at a clinic getting std tested. Which of us won the morality award in this break up.
Randomize