Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
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