it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
Duck Duck Cougar?
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
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I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
I didn't notice because vodka
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
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