your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
Classy. Drunk on alcoholic "energy drink" at work before 8 am on a Tuesday. Between that and hanging out in bars with no pants on, your life is beginning to sound like a Bukowski novel.
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
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