We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
I feel like the only phrases I can clearly speak while drunk consist of: i'm fucking drunk, chug, and shots
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
I want Samuel L. Jackson to stand beside me and narrate my morning shits.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
