I saw his package. It spoke to me.
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
What's the point of bringing a Jack and Coke to work if my boss is just gonna piss and moan about me day drinking again?
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
Randomize
