plz talk dirty to me
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
My face smells like last night's lay. I need a whore bath. Or a corndog.
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
I didn't have cash to pay cover at the bar, so I traded the bouncer a Krispy Kreme doughnut i had in my purse
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
He casually compared computer science to childbirth and I was like "hey, as someone who has wanted to fuck you for six months now, could you please never talk about childbirth ever again"
Randomize
