just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
I just woke up to a ten minute voicemail of you sobbing about the X-Men. Stop getting drunk and watching Marvel movies.
BUT WOLVERINE IS SO TORMENTED AND JUST WANTS TO BE LOVED
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Randomize
