WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
Randomize