dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
Randomize