I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
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